Fat Vampire by Johnny B Truant, Image courtesy of story teller's website
Reginald Baskin is a normal guy who is shy and not so good with women. He weighs 350 pounds and works for a fitness company - out the back of course.
He is the butt of office jokes by the all too perfect fit guys. Fat Vampire starts with Reginald praying to God for his money back, even though he doesn't believe in God.
Reginald meets the new 'kid' who works in IT on the nightshift. His name is Maurice. Maurice looks deathly pale; appears to be about nineteen years old and he looks like a pimply goth. He wears all black and has a sword strapped to his belt all the time. Reginald and Maurice strike up a semi-friendship that results in them meeting up to go bowling at night before the night shift starts.
That's when a group of four vampires turn up; two men and two stunning women. There's a fight between Maurice and the male vampires which results in Reginald being injured and on the verge of death. He chooses to die a little earlier and live forever because being a vampire has got to be way better than his human life so far.
But once Reginald has to learn how to be a vampire on his own, he finds out that the Hollywood tales aren't so true. That is when the story gets funny.
Reginald isn't very good at being a vampire. He's fat, massively unfit and can't 'catch' his food. People out run him, dodge him and beat him up. Even a 10-year-old girl can out pace this vampire! Poor Reginald is forced to suck on steak to live and as he's never tasted human blood, he's okay with it.
It turns out that there is a vampire council that have to test Reginald because he has been turned without going through the trials. That's pretty funny and sad at the same time.
But the one thing Reginald's vampire powers have enhanced to the extreme are his mental faculties. Yep, Reginald is a super-big-brained-Fat-Vampire who can't catch people but he can speed read!
This is such a fun book to read. There is explicit language used, so mature readers who enjoy a bit of funny vampire humour would like this.I thoroughly enjoyed that Reginald is a vampire that breaks all the stereotypical rules that have been over-done in popular culture. I like him and I laughed so hard in parts of the second book that I could hardly breathe.
Fat Vampire is the first book in a series of six. I heard about it from listening to the Self-Publishing Podcast. When I downloaded the book and began to read it, I was hooked. I had to buy the book deal from Amazon Kindle so I could find out what else happens to Reginald.
The first book in the series, Fat Vampire, is free download on Amazon.
Johnny B Truant is one of three story tellers who collaborate to create entertaining stories that cross genre boundaries. If you like listening to podcasts and you don't mind some explicit language, plus some off topic amusing conversation, then check out the Self-Publishing Podcast. Johnny B Truant co-hosts the show with co-story tellers Sean Platt and David W. Wright. I admit that I love listening in on their podcast show because they are funny, rude, off-topic and on-topic. But most of all they are real people who are making a living out of writing and telling stories that entertain. Honestly, when Johnny B Truant, Sean Platt and David W. Wright start to laugh and giggle, I can't help but become swept up in their world.
If you're looking for a great fun read this Halloween, check out Fat Vampire.